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Dueling Discs, Vol. 1: Frat Rock 70s vs Frat Rock 80s

Yes, you read that correctly. Frat Rock. What the “Now That’s What I Call Music!” series is to radio friendly pop hits, the “Frat Rock” franchise is to songs my dad did some serious broing out to (if that’s what they even called it back then). Lucky for you, in this inaugural installment of Dueling Discs, the “Frat Rock” albums from the 70s and 80s will do battle, giving you a better idea of which decade Belushied better.

Let’s start this clash with a breakdown of the track list from Frat Rock: The 70s. The album hits you in the face with frat by “Takin’ Care of Business” (Bachman-Turner Overdrive) and then shows you just how few shits it gives about the administration by “Smokin’ in the Boys’ Room” (Brownsville Station). Despite their improper use of the gerund, both of these tracks suggest that the 70s bro was a badass who laughed in the face of education, leaving plenty of time to be free, free as a bird. You guessed it; “Free Bird” (Lynyrd Skynyrd) makes an appearance on the album. At a whopping 9:08, this track is by far the…second longest track on the disc, topped by “Do You Feel Like We Do” (Peter Frampton). The length of these tracks surely means they were used as background music during late night hours at the frat, bringing new meaning to being a fan of Skynyrd or Frampton.

“Hey bro, heard you were singing with the talk box last night, awww yeeeaaa…”

Rounding out a solid lineup of tunes, none other than the live version of “Lola” by The Kinks adds that sensitive side to the album that every frat boy yearns to posses (in order to win the heart of his sorority crush of course). In total, Frat Rock: The 70s scores well on the Bromometer at 7 out of 10.

Next up we’ll take a look at Frat Rock: The 80s to see if more hair makes for a better brand of bro. The track that stands out immediately on the 80’s edition of Frat Rock is “Our House” (Madness). There aren’t many things more frat-tastic than sitting on your porch yelling at a gaggle of passing rival bros “This is our House… in the middle of our street… that isn’t technically ours; it actually belongs to a bunch of rich dudes.” Other highlights on the album include “Hot Hot Hot” by Buster Poindexter (just look at him, that guy is frat) and “867-5309/Jenny” by Tommy Tutone. Both of these songs could still get a rise out of a party, crafting a conga line or a late night sing along. Finally, “Whip It” by Devo gives this album some much-needed kinkiness. But will it be enough to top the brotastic lineup of songs from Frat Rock: The 70s???

Nope. This album comes in at a 6.5 on the Bromometer, making it the runner-up in this first ever Dueling Discs post. Confratulations to Frat Rock: The 70s on its big win! Those bros sure knew how to jive.

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